The carbon-credit award for the most trees chopped down goes to ParkingEye, who are now up to 50 pages for POPLA appeals, and over 100 pages for court cases. Their explanation of why they should not show their contract now uses twice as many pages as the contract itself.
They also get a minor award for creative redaction of contracts.
The two-hats award goes to Nick Lester, managing to be involved with both POPLA and the BPA Ltd while deftly managing any potential conflict of interest. Even the Prankster only has one hat.
The we-are-big-roughty-toughty-people-and-you-should-be-mightily-afeared-of-us award goes to Civil Enforcement Limited, for running away with their tails between their legs if anyone they filed a claim against looked remotely like actually turning up in court.
Runners up are Highview Parking and CP Plus for constantly threatening to spring into immediate action, but never actually doing anything.
The lifetime award for services to investigative accountancy goes to the BPA Ltd, for repeatedly refusing to recognise that if ParkingEye run their whole business on costs £53 per issued ticket, and they charge up to £100 per ticket, then a profit of up to £47 cannot possibly be a genuine pre-estimate of loss. As both ParkingEye's filed 2012 accounts and projected profit from the Capita press release show profits of over 30%, then the BPA Ltd's failure to seriously investigate ParkingEye's statement 'we only make a small profit per ticket' tipped the judge's votes, and the BPA Ltd are therefore worthy winners of this coveted award. Steve Clark, the BPA Ltd employee ultimately responsible for making the decision, and the man whose linked-in profile shows how qualified he is to do this with his extensive background in sales and publication, was not available to receive the award.
The award for the best off-topic post goes to magicbucks.
Congratulations on the award, magicbucks, and good luck with the wedding.
Happy Parking
The Parking Prankster
Thanks for confirming that Steve Clark has no legal qualifications. I though as much judging by the drivel I received from him when I queried the way Parking Eye calculated their "losses". He agreed with PE that they can include day-to-day costs as losses in their claims.
ReplyDeleteRemember the BPA Ltd propaganda about putting the consumer at the heart of their thinking?..........well this is what Steve Clark really thinks about the public, "Bitch of a day - too many e-mails to deal with and morons on the phone
ReplyDeleteIf you don't buy a parking ticket and you get a charge notice, you get what you deserve - get over it Swearing at me about it is not brave. Rant over"
(Source Steve Clark's public FaceBook profile)
I think you should have a special "Most Deluded Person Working in the Parking Industry" award for Jonathan Langham, for all those "Statements of Truth" which are mostly not true at all.
ReplyDeleteAward for most revealing council - Chester West for providing a full contract from ParkingEye
ReplyDeleteMost friendly clampit award to Peter ('I know where you live)' Del Grosso of BPA AOS member Auto Security Ltd.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/Notorious-clamper-Peter-Del-Grosso-Hull-boss-new/story-18076684-detail/story.html
(thanks to Ewan Hoosami for the spot)
The most interesting advert award goes to...ANPR in a Box by our Trev...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.anprinabox.com/component/virtuemart/most-wanted-detail.html
Description
Car thieves terrorists or undesirables such as shop lifters can be easily detected and monitored.